The Conversion Narrative: An Account of Eternal Grace

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Two individuals who had a profound effect on Puritan society are John Winthrop and Jonathan Edwards. Edwards, valedictorian of his class at what would come to be known as Yale University in 170, eventually became a minister notorious for the "evangelical" nature of his ministry. Edwards subscribed to a Calvanist doctrine, believing that man exercised will, motivated by "apparent good." He asserted that man, while entering the world in complete depravity, was not predisposed to right or wrong behavior, a stance detailed in his book known as The Freedom of the Will. Winthrop, in contrast, was well-grounded in traditional Puritan values, as he was born prior to the departure of the Mayflower for the New World. Winthrop, who like Edwards became a minister, had visions of "a city of God," an ideal society for Puritans. His sermon, "A Modell of Christian Charity," expounds upon this notion, explaining how Puritans would impact one another's personal lives in a true sense of community. In addition, Winthrop, like any other dedicated Puritan, harbored a belief in the Covenant of Grace, which proposed that God offered His Son, Jesus Christ, as a sacrifice to atone for the sins of mankind, and to ensure the salvation of those destined to go to Heaven. Furthermore, Puritans believed that God would discern individuals whom He had predestined to go to Heaven by inclining his presence upon their hearts. Such an act is called a "conversion experience." John Winthrop, in his autobiographical work "Christian Experience," and Jonathan Edwards, in his account called "Personal Narrative," both present a personal account of a conversion experience; this essay will serve to discuss and dissect the parallels and distinct differences evident between the two works.

In each of the conversion narratives, there is an arduous struggle with impurity in early life. Each man professed to have had a sense of religious conviction, but each also inevitably succumbed to the desires of his flesh. Ironically, each was afflicted with a sickness, whereupon recovering, each returned to his sinful ways. Winthrop, specifically, appears flummoxed by his lust, as he declares that "my lusts were so masterly as no good could fasten upon mee [sic], otherwise than to hold mee to some task of ordinary dutyes [sic] for I cared for nothing but how to satisfy my voluptuous heart" (handout, 5). Kpodo

Another similarity between the two narratives is how both describe the act of soul-searching, an important element of Puritanism. Edwards would often take to solitude, retreating to the Hudson's river banks for hours at a time, spending the time in "contemplation on divine things, and secret converse with God . . ." (66). In struggling to find a sense of inner peace, Winthrop considers that perhaps he needs to develop a closer relationship with God. He seeks strength to combat his flesh, as he feels that it is stronger than his spirit.

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Yet another element the narratives have in common is that of self-abasement, which is also important in Puritanism. Winthrop gives an account of how, at a time during his youth when he studied theology, the magnitude of his sin was ignominious to him. He declares, "I was ashamed to open my case to any minister that knew mee; I feared it would shame my self and religion also, that such an eminent professour as I was accounted, should discover such corruptions as I found in my selfe . . ." (handout, 6). Edwards, ever emotional and dramatic, likewise conveys a sense of mortification with respect to his impurity "My wickedness, as I am in myself, has long appear'd to me perfectly ineffable, and infinitely swallowing up all thought and imagination; like an infinite deluge or infinite mountains over my head" (6). Of course, both narratives describe the conversion experience as a majestic, tear-provoking, life-altering experience. Winthrop states that he was about 0 years old, and he had engaged in a cerebral contemplation of the covenant of free grace. Reflecting upon his past, he realized that God had stricken him with an illness in an effort to humble him, leaving him "as a weaned child. . . . I knew I was worthy of nothing for I knew I could doe [sic] nothing for him or for my selfe. I could only mourn, and weep to think of free mercy to such a vile wretch as I was" (handout, 7). Edwards's experience occurred in 177, as he was taking a walk in the woods, an activity in which he engaged on a regular basis. He gives this account of the wondrous event "The person of Christ appear'd ineffably excellent, with an excellency great enough to swallow up all thought and conception, which continued, as near as I can judge, about an hour; which kept me, the bigger part of the time, in a flood of tears, and weeping aloud" (6).On the contrary, a major difference between the two narratives is the motivation of the two men. On one hand, Winthrop suggests that he did not fear eternal damnation so much as being perceived as not wholeheartedly appreciating what he considered God's free grace. Upon having his conversion experience, he feels the need "to mourn for my ingratitude towards my God, and his free, and rich mercy. Kpodo The consideration whereof would break my heart more, and wring more teares [sic] from myne [sic] eyes, then ever the fear of Damnation or any affliction had done . . ." (handout, 8). On the other hand, Edwards appears to feel mightily distressed and guilty about his sins, especially in the aftermath of his conversion experience. He states, "It has often appeared to me, that if God should mark iniquity against me, I should appear the very worst of all mankind; of all that have been since the beginning of the world to this time; and that I should have by far the lowest place in hell" (6). Judging from the sentiment, it would not be far-fetched to believe that his preoccupation with his sins was a byproduct of his belief that an individual possesses a sense of will; he likely believes that because he made a conscious choice to commit the sins he committed, he is to be held accountable for those sins.

In that way, perhaps such an attitude justifies the stark contrast in tone between the two narratives. Edwards conveys a tone much more passionate and effusive than that of Winthrop, insipid in comparison. Edwards steadily raves about thoughts he used to have, prior to his conversion experience, pertaining to such issues as holiness and being inspired by the doctrines of the gospel, almost as if he is attempting to "will" his salvation. In a moment of introspection, he notes that a true Christian's soul "appear'd like such a little white flower, as we see in the spring of the year; low and humble on the ground, opening its bosom, to receive the pleasant beams of the sun's glory. . . ." (65)

All in all, both of the conversion narratives present an awesome, compelling account of how each man's life dramatically changed upon being graced by God's presence. Through the course of this essay, pertinent issues including Puritan values, motivation, and tone have been discussed. Each narrative projects a different set of circumstances that helped to mold and shape each man's life, ultimately preparing him for the greatest, most gratifying experience of his life. Works CitedLauter, Paul. The Heath Anthology of American Literature. Boston/New York Houghton Mifflin

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